luna question #4

January 30, 2009

luna question #4

It's been a while since i did one of these, but it's something i want to get back into doing regularly, so here's my answer to the question luna posted on her site yesterday:

Do you or your partner play with others outside your relationship? Are there limits to this play within your dynamic? How comfortable are you with this play?

It depends how you define 'play'. If it means 'scene' as in at a club or party, then no neither of us do. If it means submit to or Dominate as a private scene, then again no not really, though i have submitted to another Dom before at Sir's request, and i will be expected to submit to a Domme in future. But these are only ever instigated by Sir, and they're more like training activities than actual 'play' - i wouldn't choose them for my own enjoyment and Sir is always there watching and directing. i have also 'played' a little with another girl in r/l, and that i did enjoy, but again it was with Sir's permission and it was part of my training. The only other example i can think of is the 'scening' i do in online chatrooms, where i 'play' with other Dom/mes and subs (especially flame) and that is probably the type of play with others i enjoy the most because it's no pressure, no strings attached. Sir has never played with else since we started our relationship, which is what i prefer but i have no right to insist on. Actually, it's what He prefers too so i'm lucky there.

As for the limits question, i guess Sir sets the limits because i am only allowed to play for as long as He is happy for me to do so. If He turned round tomorrow and banned me from scening online ever again, or decided i would not be used by other Dom/mes anymore, i would have to accept that. A few times He has set certain restrictions to my online play and i've always followed them faithfully, because i know it it a privilege for me to be allowed to play with others at all.

i am comfortable with the online scening, infact i actively enjoy it when it is with the right person. i am ok with the submitting to other Dom/mes but tolerate it more than enjoy it. Were i to be expected to play with other people in r/l who i don't know, i would be very uncomfortable and awkward about this, but i don't think this is something my Sir will ask of me, though you never know.

Hope that answered the questions, please ask any more if you are interested.