Headspace

November 22, 2009

Headspace

Recently i've found myself in a really good headspace. Ignoring the swine flu week, which left me feeling down and low and lonely, i've been feeling like i've got my life in balance and am doing my best in all aspects of my life at the moment - as a slave, as a wife, as a mother, as a nursery nurse, as a friend. Of course, i could always do with more time - to serve Sir, to play with Poppy, to keep on top of the housework, to spend with flame, to visit my family, to work on my training, to prepare activities for the children at work - but i feel that i am doing my best with the time i've got and am managing to keep on top of all aspects of my life without neglecting any area.

i also feel like i'm in a good place mentally with my slavery at the moment - i'm feeling confident and comfortable with knowing where i am and what's expected of me, and i'm able to use all the little gestures of submission which have been incorporated into my daily life to keep me going until we can play or scene or train together at the weekend when someone else looks after Poppy for a little while. Recently in the evenings, after Poppy is safely tucked up in bed, Sir has been using the time to chat to me about aspects of my submission and training, and where He wants to take me from here. And that's been making me feel contented as a slave and excited about the future. And of course, i've been preparing mentally for my hopefully upcoming pregnancy and how having a new baby will change things. But having gone through it once with Poppy i'm confident that we can adapt things again to incorporate the new lil one whilst still maintaining the dynamic between us.

It's been such a long time since Sir had to punish me for a mistake, or even discipline me to keep me on the right track, so that makes me happy too - that i'm better able to keep within the rules and boundaries by myself without needing reminders from Sir. And Sir is always telling me how happy He is with me and the effort i'm putting in, and now that i'm well over the pnd, life just feels good at the moment and i'm in a good place. Let's hope it continues that way!