libby the life model

March 27, 2010

libby the life model

So, as i mentioned before, Sir has started me on 'exhibitionism' training and part of that entails being a life model for an art class (which Sir is also attending). Last Saturday we went along to meet the woman who runs the class and find out exactly what my role would entail, and then Sunday i did 2 hours of life modelling for the very first time! Here's my account of what happened:

The art class is for 'intermediate' art students, i.e. those who have a bit of talent but need guidance on developing their technique, and it runs for 8 weeks using a variety of media but concentrating on drawing the human body. The same woman also runs a similar class on Saturdays using still lifes as the inspiration but Sir wasn't as keen to attend those classes! Last Sunday was focusing on using chalk and charcoal, and there were 12 people taking the class (roughly equal amounts of men and women) plus the art teacher, so i was naked in a room of 12 strangers! i was shown through to a separate room to change into a robe, whilst the teacher did an intro on how to use chalk and charcoal, and then i was called through and asked to think of 3 different 'short' poses to do so that the students could practice their sketching techniques. i did one pose standing up holding my belly bump, one sitting with my feet curled up next to me and one sitting on the floor with my legs crossed in front, leaning back on my hands. Because i only had to hold each pose for 10 minutes there was no achiness or cramps, so from that point of view it was easy. But actually getting naked in front of strangers and then having to remain still whilst they examined every part of my body was very difficult and i felt nervous and shy for the whole of that first half hour.

Then i had a short break (during which i went to the loo and had a drink) whilst the teacher talked about some of the sketches done, and gave tips and pointers to the students, and then i was asked to come back in and the teacher helped me to pose in a specific way she had in mind - sprawled out on the sofa in the middle. It was a nice comfy pose because i had to try and stay like that for the next 50 minutes, but again i was very aware at the beginning of my nakedness, especially when the teacher started going round making comments like "look more closely at her form, i don't think you've got the rise of the breasts quite right there". But as the class continued i came to the realisation that all the people there were looking at me as an object to be drawn, so they weren't thinking about my body in terms of which parts were pretty and which parts had flaws, but more like the shape and size and proportion of each part in order to be able to represent it accurately, just the same as the sofa i was laying on. And that made me feel a lot better and i kind of daydreamed laying there for a while, which made the time go much quicker.

When the time was up i went back through to the other room to get dressed whilst everyone showed their work and talked about it, and the teacher pointed out the good parts of what each person had done. i came back through towards the end of that, and it was really weird but also really great to be able to see myself in so many pictures and i thought i looked beautiful in some of them, which made me really pleased. The whole experience was kind of liberating in a way, and i'm no longer nervous about going back each week. Sir has already said that He'd like me to stay on to model for the sculpture course which is being held for 8 weeks after this one finishes, but i am allowed to choose whether i do or not. i really want to because Sir said He would keep the sculpture of me for our house, but i am also worried about how big i might be by then and it might be an ugly big not a good one. But we'll see. For now the exhibitionism is coming along OK, and i'm very relieved.